3 Stages of the Fuck It Diet: Stage 1

There are three stages of eating recovery, as far as I’m concerned.

Stage 1: Learn to Eat Again

Stage 2: Learn to Love Your Body

Stage 3: Enjoy & Learn to Live

Stage 1 begins when you realize you never want to diet again, and scared as you are, you know it is the right decision, so you begin.

Stage 1 is where you start to eat food you were afraid of, and even though it may continue to scare you, you keep going.

Stage 1 is when you can’t get enough food, and feel like you are eating more than “you should”.

Stage 1 is where you try to accept your body as it is. You try. You still find it hard, you still wonder if you ever will, but you try.

You are starting out bravely, but filled with anxiety over letting go of control.

Stage 1 is where you worry you will gain “too much weight.”

Stage 1 is where you worry you are a bottomless pit and will never stop eating.

Stage 1 is anxiety ridden. It is terrifying. It is completely exciting, liberating, cathartic, and can be horribly paralyzing at times, too.

Stage 1 takes experimentation, patience, bravery, conviction, and support. Stage 1 takes constant reminding, and reading up on, and talking one’s self out of turning around.

Stage 1 can last a really long time. Approximately anywhere from 3 months to 2 years.

Stage 1 is the period when you gain weight and have to keep eating anyway.

Stage 1 is the period when you still have fears related to the foods you are eating, and are still continually calming yourself down.

Stage 1 is where you have anxiety over having anxiety over food. Anxiety causing anxiety (“shouldn’t I be normal yet?!” No. It takes time.)

Stage 1 is where, through good old-fashioned eating, you start to slowly learn that none of the things you were scared of can ruin you. Stage 1 is where anxiety lingers, and then eventually drops off.

Stage 1 is over when anxiety around eating is over.

But it is not the end of the journey.

Subscribe to get the posts on Stage 2 & Stage 3 through email-only, next Thursday.

9 thoughts on “3 Stages of the Fuck It Diet: Stage 1

  1. Lucy says:

    What I’m really struggling with during stage one is the physical pain and discomfort caused by re-introducing food that had been off limits for so long (GAPS/Paleo 3 years.) I am finding it difficult to keep pushing through and the fear of gaining weight has been replaced by the question of “will this cause me pain?” At least I’m kind of over the weight thing though:) Any tips for the physical discomfort?

  2. Allison says:

    I’m pretty sure I’ve been in stage one for the past ten years, and there’s still no light at the end of the tunnel.

  3. SO there. The anxiety sometimes seems to make emotional eating worse, and then of course restrictive urges appear. It’s exhausting and I know this is typically where I fall off the recovery bandwagon. Hanging on with all I’ve got!

  4. Lib says:

    I am definitely near the end of this stage. I have noticed that I am loving the way the extra couple layers of fat looks over the muscle I have from weight lifting. I have gained 5-7lbs since eating normal and I will got about three weeks of no food anxiety and then I have to fight the urge of wanting to lose ten lbs to appear more “shredded.”

  5. Erin says:

    I’ve been in stage 1 for a year and i’m still struggling. My main food fears are; chocolate, bread, bagels, crackers, sweets, and anything with lots of ingredients. Guess what i binge on? Chocolate, bread, bagels, crackers,sweets and anything with lots of ingredients..i m more orthorexic than anything. I did paleo and have an obsession with protein. Paleo didnt work and i craved carbs constantly (mainly bread) and no matter how inpushed i was hungrier for more thann2 meals a day. Im not afraid of fat, but sugar really does send my anxiety levels through the roof… im afraid if i eat sugar it will age me, make me lose muscle, get fat /or slack-skinny fat and diabetes etc. Im 165lbs which is 20lbs above my healthy weight for me. I keep eating until i feel sick when i binge. Loaves of bread, large bars of chocolate…i did legalise them and found i didnt want sweets/chocolate every day because i feel groggy, but my mind does. I just want to be normal :(

  6. ereefairy says:

    I am desperate at this point. Ive been trying to eat intuitively for over a yeaf and still binge. Im terrified of carbs..and glorify protein and fat. (Thanks paleo!) I do eat carbs but i always binge on bread and crackers because of guilt. I still want to lose weight and i dont know how to just RELAX. Im overexercising (not doing hours or anything, but too much for me right now) and yet im still 25lbs overweight thanks to bingeing. I dont know what to do :/

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