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Let’s start 2020 with a F*ck It Diet 101. A Primer. (Again!)
My instagram grew by 100,000 followers in 2019. That’s an average of 273 new people a day.
Big picture, that’s fantastic and super exciting. But day to day, it means new people are seeing random, one-line posts that speak to one tiny piece of this whole puzzle, and they are intrigued, but more: they’re confused.
And instead of saying: ok let me check out this woman’s site, podcast, or better yet, book, they ask for me to explain The F*ck It Diet to them, right there, in the comments or direct message.
The hardest part is that there is no short answer. It’s complicated. It’s nuanced. There is a lot to explain!!!
Also, when I am writing things for social media I have to make a choice: Am I posting on social media for newbies? Or for people who’ve read the book and already get it? That’s a pretty wide divide, but I kind of have to do both.
So if you’re new, and confused, a great way to get a basic primer on TFID, is to sign up for the “Free Fun Stuff” right here! I send the beginning of the book, and three free primer lessons.
Another really great way to understand WTF The F*ck It Diet is and why I think what I think, and how to actually do it, is to read the book.
But also, here is another primer on WHY DIETS DON’T WORK:
- Our bodies are wired to push us off any diet or restriction – and, even though we tend to think this is a horrible thing, or something we need to overcome and conquer, it’s actually a good thing. Our resistance to dieting is a biological advantage for famine survival. But that inherent protection against dieting is why dieting is so hard, and leaves us so obsessed with food. And why we get so hungry. It’s why we can’t stop thinking about food. It’s why we binge. And why we almost always gain the weight back. We are wired that way.
- So, what counts as restriction? Calorie restriction, macronutrient restriction (like keto), time restriction (like intermittent fasting), any over thinking or micromanaging of eating amounts or times or purity, over-exercising, over-thinking and over-worrying about hunger and fullness (yes!), and any intentional weight loss.
- Dieting causes food addiction. Well… sort of. This is nuanced. And semantics. Food addiction is both real and … not very real at all. It’s not an addiction in the true sense of the word. But we definitely feel addicted when we are restricted in any way. Even just mentally restricted (more on that soon). It’s that same protection against famines I just mentioned. Dieting makes us fixated on food. Chemically. In our brain and in our body.) Dieting and restricting make us feel (and act) addicted to food (and carbs). It feels VERY REAL, but it is just the state we are in when the body is screaming indiscriminately for food. (“PLEASE DON’T LET US DIE THIS WAYYYYY”.)
- Our culture has a disordered relationship to weight. Which gives us a very disordered relationship to food. Our culture is extremely and insidiously fatphobic. What’s fatphobia? For our purposes here, compare it to homophobia. A very cultural fear and judgment of certain people. We make assumptions about people. We believe the stereotypes. Not only is this messed up, but it messes up all of our eating – wide scale. Insidiously. Subconsciously. We have to unlearn all the things we’ve learned about weight, especially as it relates to health. Our relationship to weight is f*cked up, and based on faulty information. Weight is not a direct result of our habits. And you cannot tell someone’s habits or health from looking at them. That widespread belief is simplistic and causes a lot of harm, cruelty, and mistreatment. Our own healthy weight range is very genetic, and can only be manipulated so much, without consequences. This requires more than an instagram post or a blog post to unpack. I recommend lots of further reading on this. Read my book. Research weight stigma. Go to the Size Diversity and Health website. Read as many Health at Every Size® resources you can. Read Body Respect. Read Anti-Diet.
- It’s a lot better for out overall health, to focus on gentle health habits without focusing on weight. It’s entirely possible to improve health without changing our weight at all.
- The F*ck It Diet is for chronic dieters who have seen diets fail too many times, and have seen what happens to their bodies, minds, and health when they keep trying diet after diet. It’s aligned with intuitive eating, but it’s also speaking to the people who turned intuitive eating into a diet.
- After dieting or restricting, it’s normal and healthy (and important) to eat a lot of food, and to crave a lot of food. It’s a normal part of the process, and it’s a part where a lot of people get freaked out, or stuck, or thinking “this can’t be healthy.”
- “But I’m less of a dieter and more of a binger!” The F*ck It Diet is actually geared towards bingers. Most dieters (even casual dieters) are bingers.
- “But I’m an emotional eater!” Emotional eating is a way more effective drug when you’re dieting, or have a weird relationship with food. You can’t heal emotional eating with more restriction, it just makes you feel more and more addicted to food. I address emotions in depth in my book too!
- Guilt around food – and mental restriction – can and will keep us stuck in dysfunction around food as well, and can also lead to bingeing. Guilt around food makes us feel like another diet might be coming, which can wire us to fixate on food without any *actual* physical restriction. Which is why it takes a lot of time to undo, we have to become aware of what’s going on in our minds.
(Confused? Intrigued??? Read my book, The F*ck It Diet! Or read the beginning for free at thefuckitdiet.com/free )
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Skeptical on the science part? Read the open access journal: Weight Science: Evaluating the Evidence for a Paradigm Shift (and read my book).