This isn’t a trick. I really don’t condone mindful eating.

And I’ll tell you why:

When you attempt mindful eating, you’re going to make it into an obsessive, perfectionistic way to eat, and then it’s gonna backfire, and you’re going to binge and wonder why ‘it’s not working’.

If you’re someone who has been stressed about the food you eat, the antidote is not mindful eating.

The antidote is neutral, normal, messy, haphazard, who-gives-a-fuck-if-you-order-fries eating.

You don’t need to add one more day of worrying that you’re eating too fast, or not rating your hunger level, or not paying attention to the chickens who lay the eggs in the muffin you’re eating.

I mean it.

You need to just eat, and eat what you want, and eat a lot. That is the ONLY way you’re ever going to neutralize food, and neutralizing food is the ONLY way you are ever going to actually be able to hear what your body wants without all that NOISE and the ANXIETY in the way.

And being able to neutrally hear what the body wants (and doesn’t want) is the closest you ever need to get to mindful eating.

I mean that so sincerely.

You don’t need to eat slowly in order to learn to eat normally.

If your goal is to be a monk, that’s another story. Then… sure. Eat slowly and mindfully and meditate over your food. Make it part of your spiritual practice. What do I care!

I’ll be eating casseroles and ice cream in front of the tv, stopping when I’m done because I don’t feel like more, and waking up to drink my morning cappuccino while I multi-task.

That’s the way you find food freedom. Make food less of a big deal instead of more of a big deal.

And the paradox is (and there is always a paradox), that’s the best way to really give yourself what you want and need.